What he’s saying may hurt but it’s my biggest takeaway from therapy and the reason I believe everyone should experience therapy at some point in their lives (with a good therapist). Therapy not only validates trauma you’ve experienced and makes you feel less crazy about the things you’ve gone through, but it also pulls out your flaws and holds you accountable for the things that you always thought were good. I was a chronic giver. Every time I went to therapy I would always be so sad and depleted by how situations turned out for me with people. I would say but “I gave him so much” or “I did so much for them” or “I was there for her too but I never get acknowledged for it.”
My therapist looked me dead in my face and said - stop. You want to believe that people shouldn’t/won’t hurt you because you chose to sacrifice your whole self for them when no one asked you too. You pouring so much into them, dropping everything you’re doing to help them or talk to them, were all your choices. So now when they don’t reciprocate or do what you want, you’re the only one that’s left without. You’re the only one sad, you’re the only one picking up the pieces. Of course people will take from you because you freely give anything and everything when you didn’t have it to give in the first place.
Talk about a reality check lol.
When I posted 2023 is my year of recognition: seen, valued, protected, respected, and appreciated. It’s what I mean. I deserve to get what I’ve always given and I don’t accept anything less than that anymore. When people say Jada you don’t go anywhere anymore, or you don’t reach out as much. I know. It’s very intentional. It’s my season to keep my cup overflowing. It’s my season for people to give to me just as much as a have given to them and one thing I noticed quickly is the real ones fall in line and the people who aren’t meant for you disappear.
Mood: Not Nice - Megan The Stallion